Saturday, October 26, 2013

True Confessions of an Almost Author

I'm a writer; I love to write.  I blog. I've read countless books on writing, taken writing courses, am currently enrolled in COMPEL(a fantastic writing course through Proverbs 31 Ministries), and Jeff Goins, that talented guy who wrote Wrecked, The In-Between, Writer's Manifesto; he says I'm a writer.  He wrote a book about it: "YOU ARE A WRITER (So Start Acting Like One) by Jeff Goins.  I grabbed the Kindle Edition.

So where am I on this writing journey?  Probably right about where you are...

There's a book in me; several books in me.  If you're reading this, there's probably a book in you too. The thing is, they need to come out.  Besides reading about the craft, studying the craft, practicing the craft; eventually, we'll have to take the plunge, put ourselves "out there".   I'm just not too sure where "out there" is.  I know for a fact there are thousands like us; dipping our toe in the pool.  The water may be cold at first, takes a bit of getting used to.  Let's dive in; it's time to swim.

I've read that commenting on blogs is a good thing.  Does anyone else get obsessive about checking for replies after they've made a comment?  Confession:  I do.  Having said that (yes, overused), I have no hidden agenda when it comes to commenting on blog posts;  very simply, I have something to say that may hopefully add value to the conversation.

We know social interaction is obviously good for a writer; name recognition, branding, all good.   So my email address is my name, my blog address includes my name, my new blog is my  I find this difficult since it seems in direct conflict to humbling myself, and the important reminder "it's not about me."  Still, I'm thinking God is okay with others knowing my name; after all, He calls me by name.

Have you ever googled your name?  Confession:  I have. I googled my name yesterday, guess what popped up? A few pics of me, a pic of my friend Lisa (?), and umpteen images of "Doris" Day and Taylor "Swift".  I'm thinking a cross between the two of them wouldn't be a bad thing.  I guess that would be me.

Would you say you've struggled with doubt and fear?  Confession:  I would.   Yes, doubts creep in, yes they do. I'd like to think of myself as pretty fearless; I've given my fears to God and I'm in a good place as far as fear goes.  I would have to say though, there is one fear I have to keep pushing back, pushing down; a fearful thought I have to continually take captive to the obedience of Christ.  What is this fear? The fear that this dream will never take shape, will never come to pass.  Satan loves to tell us that lie repeatedly, doesn't he?  Do you ever have that same fear?  I do know love casts out fear, so I draw on that unconditional love when the fear and doubt creeps in.  If He's called us, He will equip us.  He will.

Then there's that word... the word most of us at this stage of the game get a little creeped out about; platform.  I'd like to think I'm a pretty likable person, but unless something goes viral, this is going to pose quite a challenge.  To aim for 100,000 hits on my blog in one month, a little intimidating.  Let me rephrase that, a lot intimidating. Intimidating yes, but not impossible:

Jesus said to him, 
   "If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes."  Mark 9:23

Yes Lord, I believe.

Confession: I have exactly 5 blog followers, whom I love dearly; My number of facebook friends only slightly exceeds the current balance in my checking account; and I have "grown" to 34 followers on Twitter.  I follow Jesus, but I don't think He's on Twitter.

Viral is another catch phrase popular in today's culture. The closest I've come to viral is having Chickenpox in 3rd grade.  So, until I can teach my cat to flush the toilet, I'm thinking viral might be a bit far-reaching for me.  

Have you noticed after a video has gone viral, these people wind up as guests on the Today Show?  Hey, wait a minute, I've been on the Today Show!  Well, I'm using the word "on" a bit loosely.  Brian and I were in NYC for our 25th anniversary in 2009.  We had been watching the Today Show for years, laughing at all the crazy people standing outside for hours; then, we decided to become one of them.  We had our daughter DVR the show that morning, hoping we'd make the big-time with our hot-pink, homemade sign.  We did!  We were seen on camera during several shots as they panned the crazies.  We carefully avoided deleting the recorded show, until the DVR finally crashed. Thankfully, we had taken a photo of the TV screen.  See....
No, that's not me standing with my husband under our anniversary sign, oops!  I must have been out of view trying to wave down Al Roker. The highlight of the morning for me (sorry honey), was when Meredith Vieira smiled and shook my hand!  That was during a commercial break, but what a treat!  She was as lovely in person as she looked on TV, and extremely gracious.  Here's a close-up (I don't think she'll mind, she looks great):
Sorry Savannah, this was before your time.

So last night was date-night.  I wasn't even near ready, I'd been reading and writing most of the day.  Thursday night we "COMPELers" were blessed to dial into a live conference call with Esther Fedorkevich of The Fedd AgencyPumped is the word I'd use to describe my emotion after the call.  So pumped in-fact, I replayed it again on Friday. Amazing. The entire COMPEL experience so far has been amazing.  Thank you Lysa Terkeurst and the P31 team!  Now back to date-night.  I was having a bit of trouble switching gears; my mind manufacturing a continuous stream of sticky statements.  Stalling for time, I took a bubble bath.  I figured dinner at the restaurant would be a little strange if I kept spatting out statements like "it's great to eat steak, but save room for the cake" or "a bloomin' onion to start, could clog arteries in your heart."  See what I mean?  I wasn't ready.  We did eventually go, and it was worth the wait.

Worth the wait, yes, this is.  We will get there.  Wait on the Lord, He appoints us and gives us the desires of our heart when we trust in Him. He'll give us that platform we need, because HE IS our platform; our firm foundation.  That's a promise, and our faithful God keeps His promises.

Perhaps as this journey unfolds, it won't look anything like we had hoped for; no, it will be more, it will be better.  More than we could ask or imagine.  So write!  Whether this dream comes together like fallen Manna from the sky, or whips us into shape so we can chase it, God is in control.  We don't have to scream out "I'm here!  Notice me!  Know my name, know me!" cause the only One that matters already does.

May blessings & joy fill your hearts, as you bask in His presence and grace.



  1. Replies
    1. Thank you for your comment Alisa, it means so much! God surely does bring confirmation when we Trust in Him. Love it!!

  2. Thanks for sharing your comments about your journey so far and know you are not alone in many of your feelings! (As I'm sure you know from all of your peeps going through Compel too) I too have been so ENCOURAGED through the Compel training and I'm so glad to have that blessing in my life and slowly but surely getting to know some of the other ladies and their blogs! Keep up the good work!

  3. Thanks for your comments and encouragement Brandy! I love all the connections we are making through Compel. Love your blog by the way.